Wednesday, September 30, 2009
DyVineDyalogue 2.5
DyVineDyalogue 2.5: Tainted Trust
If asked what are the most important attributes of a healthy relationship, it is undoubtedly true that trust will be among those listed. Everyone wants to be labeled trustworthy and, in turn, seek that same attribute in others. I know I do, and if you read these posts regularly, you do. You measure my actions and words in accordance to your own and you say yes.. I can trust her, or no, I cannot. To some extent, you trust what I have to say (and I thank you for that trust). However today, I did not come to speak to you about being trustworthy. You know what you require. Expect that others require the same and you’ll do just fine. I've come to address a trust we all know too well: Tainted Trust.
I had to go look up trust. This is the definition that I got from Dictionary.com: Trust - noun. Confident expectation of something; hope. I was quite astonished to see the word “hope.” That makes this DyVineDyalogue so much easier to write. So, I shall define Tainted Trust as such: - noun. a trust that has been through battle and has never been fully restored. A trust that has been tarnished by lackluster love, effort, and caused by undue pain. A loss of hope in love.
I have been cheated on. I have been lied to. And I have been lied about (*side eye to the haters*). My trust has been tainted. However, I am able to write this piece because I choose to restore myself and my trust. I choose to bandage my ailing wounds and allow them to heal. And I remember that love is a chance. Each time a new set of odds are placed before me and I will not miss a chance to grow in love.
Fellas, have you ever dealt with a woman who questioned your every move? Every word? Ladies, have you dealt with a man who, no matter your efforts, believed what other people had to say about you (i.e. his mama). Barring any insecurity issues, tainted trust is your problem.
Yesterday, I said via Twitter…”There are times when you allow ppl n. And u put down the guards. U give them this power [trust]… And they hurt u…” I go on to say, “U find it harder to trust again. So u put off being vulnerable. U forget what being soft is. U alienate u and ur heart from the world…” And finally, “Little do u kno how unfair that is to those who really wanna love u” (Side note… I say some dope ish via Twitter… make a note to follow me: @DyVineSoul).
I’ve come to realize that the majority of us are out here walkin around with tainted trust. We let the experiences in the past keep in a present hell and bar us from future happiness. Love is about chance. Will he be the one? Is this my wife? And trust is about hope. I hope that he will love me enough to consider me before he thinks about cheating. I hope that she will put my feelings into consideration before she makes a big decision. Trust and Love. Love and Trust. There isn’t one without the other.
While writing this blog, I got a call from my guy whom I kick mad knowledge with most of the time. The conversation we had made my revelation so much clearer. Because this relationship between love and trust exists, we have to realize that we can never truly love until we allow ourselves to heal our tainted trust. We cannot wholeheartedly give ourselves if the trust isn’t there. We all walk around looking for love without realizing that we have to be a whole “self” before we can become an "us."
My guy of course said this, “As you get older, you go through things that make you trust people less.” To this I say, the rules of the "real" world don’t always apply in love. Love is its own warped, rose-colored world. And we have to realize that trust in the real world is not that of the love world. Its common sense that, as we age, we experience things that make us guarded. We learn of robberies and theft, so we lock our door. But if you look closely… that doesn’t apply in love. If I choose to lock my heart’s door, no one will enter and I’ll never have love. I have to be able to take a chance that if I let you make it into my yard, up the path and knock on my heart’s door, that I can let you in and, at least, look around.
When we first meet someone and as time progresses, we let them know we like them. We give them power [trust]. And as the relationship grows, we give them more and more til finally, they have our complete and total trust. And we’ve fallen in love. We’ve given them this great deal of power in our life and that makes us vulnerable. This is why it hurts so much when we people cheat and such. And this is usually why you hear people tweeting, ranting, crying and singing about not trusting again. It’s a hard thing to deal with.
Believe me, I know this isn’t easy. I know that some of us have been wronged in ways that most will never imagine. But you must heal. And you must heal properly. Take the chance on love and restore your hope. Restore your trust.
And one thing that I always like to stress is that everything that you do is about control. If you realize that you are in control of your emotions and all that is you, it is so much easier to change things. If someone has hurt you and you allow them to forever walk away with your trust, you are letting them have a power over you. Keep your control. Control your power. Say to yourself that I will trust. I will not let that person from the past keep me from what I want now and in the future.
I hope all this helps. I hope you will heal. Matter of fact… I trust that you will!
Peace & Blessings,
~DyVine~
FitBit
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Add-2 Chicago Kids
Had to post this track from Add-2. given the current state of affairs in Chicago I think it speaks volumes. And he went in over one of my favorite songs, the Ghostface Mary J, All that I got is You.
Chicago Kids
Gourmet Spring 2010 Nove
These are definitely fly. Despite the name, this Nove silhouette is schedule to release at Gourmet accounts this coming January.
Adriana Evans- 7 Days
"7 Days" is the lead single from Adriana Evans' second album, "Nomadic" available everywhere November, 10th on CD, Vinyl and Digital!
NIcki Minaj- It's Barbie Bitch! Mixtape
01. It’s Barbie Bitch Intro
02. Getting Paid [Exclusive]
03. Dang A Lang [Exclusive]
04. Itty Bitty Piggy
05. Dopeman
06. I Get Crazy (Feat. Lil’ Wayne)
07. Single Ladies (Remix)(Feat. Beyonce)
08. Feel Free (Feat. Ricky Blaze)
09. Strippin In The Club (Feat. DJ Diamond Kuts, Ron Browz, And Latif)
10. Handstand (Feat. Shanell)
11. Best I Ever Had (Feat. Drake)
12. Break Up (Remix)(Feat. Mario And Gucci Mane)
13. NY Minute (Feat. French Montana And Jadakiss)
14. Big Spender (Feat. Lil’ Wayne)
15. Click Clack
16. Warning
17. Niggas (Feat. Angel De-Mar)
18. Dead Wrong
19. Dreams
20. Sunshine (Feat. Lil’ Wayne)
21. High As A Kite (Feat. Lil’ Wayne)
22. Brraattt
23. Sticks In My Bun
24. Can’t Stop, Wont’ Stop (Feat. Lil’ Wayne)
25. Baddest Bitch
26. Firm Biz (Feat. Jadakiss)
27. Go Hard (Feat. Lil’ Wayne)
28. Shopaholic (Feat. Gucci Mane And Bobby Valentino)
29. Slumber Party (Feat. Gucci Mane)
30. Freaky Girl (Feat. Gucci Mane)
31. Automatic (Feat. Teairra Mari)
32. Lollipop (Remix)(Feat. Lil’ Wayne)[Bonus Track]
Download
Monday, September 28, 2009
Nas's Open Letter to Chicago Youth
Dear Young Warriors fighting the wrong war! I know that feeling , that frustration with life and needing to take it out on someone, any one. But....
We chose the dumbest things to go the hardest for. I remember seeing deaths over 8 ball jackets, fila's , and name plate chains. Deaths over "he say she say"!!!!! "I'm from This block or I'm from that block", or "my moms n pops is f*cked up now the whole world gotta pay"!!!
I remember feeling like I was the hardest "n*gga" breathin. And I couldn't wait to prove it.
But let's think. What r we really proving?? And proving what to who?? Everybody knows Chicago breeds the strongest of the strong but I just feel, me, being ya brother from another state feels your pain as if I grew up with you in ya very own household.
You have the ability and mindpower to change they way we are looked at. Look who's watching us young warriors, look who's throwin us in jail constantly, look at the ignorance in the world. Look at the racist dogs who love to see us down. Lovin to bury us in the ground or in jail were we continue this worthless war on one another. Young warriors.... We are WASTING more and more time. We gotta get on our jobs and take over the world. Cuz This movie left the theaters years ago, Juice, Menace, boys n the hood , blood n blood out, Belly!
When we see each other why do we see hatred? Why were we born in a storm, born soldiers, WARRIORS....and instead of building each other up we are at war with each other.. May the soul of this young person find peace with the almighty. I'm with you young warriors. You're me and I'm you. But trust me! you are fighting the wrong war.
This sh*t sucks !!
-Nas
Retweet this A Snewtonian Response to Violence in Chicago, Choices For Action
I know I been far and in between with post but I'm in one of those observant mindsets as of lately. I also have been working with the rest of the Snewty team on the launch of what will be the new Snewty.com so keep tune for that. Any who I felt the need to address a few issues via this post. Part of the meaning of being Snewty is being Socially Conscious and well informed on topics that are pertinent to your matriculation in society. Yes you read that sentence right. With that being said I think it is important that I shed light on a few instances, happenings, and tragedies that have plagued me and some of my counterparts and sparked an inkling for working to change these things. I will do my best to preserve the balance. Thus highlighting the positive and the negative. Snewty is based in Chicago and of course as of lately violence has become synonymous with the mention of my city. In particular this violence has targeted our youth.
I hoped on twitter this morning as I usually do and found a host of the individuals who I follow to be involved in passionate rants on the topic of solutions to violence in Chicago. Specifically using the story of Derrion Albert who was brutally beaten as a platform to voice there views and perspectives. Intially I thought about joining them and engaging in banter..but later decided to simply observe and use it as motivation for this post. I felt like Cousins Tyrone Williams, 19, and Percy Day, 17 who were also fatally shot this past week also deserved attention. I wanted to do something more than rant, I wanted to open eyes while providing opportunities to help. So I compiled a list of pertinent articles refelcting what is going on as well as what is being done or has been done. I was always taught the solution to a problem is in the footprints that were intially laid in creating it. So I figure after reading this if you don't want to join a movement already in progress you will collaborate with a group of friends, and put the wheels in motion. Feel free to leave comments if you are looking for someone to help you get started with an idea you have. So here it is people my gift to you information., what you choose to do with it is on you. PEACE
The Problem
-In the City of Chicago a police officer was shot for everyday of the month in July.
-Violence in Chicago has put the blood supply at hospitals at a premium
-Epidemic of Violence : City of chicago Video Montage
-CNN Black Culture of Violence in Chicago
Solutions put in Motion
-CPS 30 million Dollar Plan to Save Schools and Kids
Brady Campaign to Prevent Gun Violence
Founded by former press secretary Jim Brady and his wife after Brady was shot in an assassination attempt on Ronald Reagan, the Brady Campaign is devoted changing gun legislation through grassroots activism. The website is filled with valuable information including e-mails you can send to congress and instructions on how to organize an anti-violence protest in your neighborhood. Phone: (202) 289-7319
Coalition to Stop Gun Violence
The Coalition to Stop Gun Violence web site includes comprehensive and up-to-date information on gun legislation as well as the contact information for elected officials so you can lobby for change. The site also offers a state-by-state list of organizations working on this issue.
Phone: 202-408-0061
CeaseFire, an initiative by the Chicago Project for Violence Prevention, involves residents, clergy, schools, law enforcement and community-based organizations and welcomes volunteers in the fight against gun violence.
Phone: 312-996-8775
In 1999 a New Jersey mother, horrified by a story of a gunman randomly shooting at children, organize one of the largest marches on Washington. That grassroots effort has blossomed into 75 chapters across the country devoted to keeping families safe from gun violence. Connect with your local chapter through Million Mom March website.
Sudhir Venkatesh proffessor at Columbia University takes a stab at the cause of violence in chicago
Teacher uses Hip Hop to Make Chicago kids look Inward
Send DONATIONS 2: Pleasant Hill Baptist Church 7950 S Normal Chicago IL 60620. Write 4 family of #DerrionAlbert on envelope
#MusicMonday Real T@lk Weekly Fix
Real T@lk has two tracks for us this week since he neglected the Weekly Fix last week. First up we got him going in over the Flashing Lights Beat. Second we have a track called collegelife. Enjoy
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
Special Edition Freaky Friday: READER'S CHOICE
So as I promised last week, this week we were gonna flip it and let you guys show your inner most freak. This week has been pretty interesting to say the least but as I suspected the people who read Freaky Friday connect with what I write and you better believe go home and try the shit!! YEEESSSS!!!! But enough of me talking here is what you came for..............
Last week we talked about sex in public so lets start with this one:
So, I was out with my guy at the time, we had been to several spots duing the night drinking, so by 3a, we had been pretty drunk. We stumbled into a local bar that we frequented and sat to drink more... lol. We were with our friends... another couple. Somewhere between deciding to order more drinks or order food (since menus had been brought to us), I got the insanely crazy urge to give my boo head. If you can imagine a semi crowded bar and four people sitting at a huge booth, you'll understand that we were quite visible. So, I decided that i wasn't gonna just do it, I wanted to see if my friend would do the same to her guy... so I bet her... "I bet you won't give him head right here, right now..." I don't know if it was the Jose *Muthef*ckin* Curevo or that we were both on the same thing but, my girl goes... "I'll do it if you do it first" With that, II began to unbuckle my boo's pants, to his total surprise, and had him position his menu in such away to obstruct my "activities" from the obvious onlookers and began to give him head in the bar! Of course, I stopped to make sure my girl held up her end of the deal for her guy as well. Needless to say, our guys were happy. My boo damn near had to make me stop when the waiter came to the table! LOL. After that, we took one shot a piece and headed to the nearest exit so that we could get it in! LOL
I gotta do this man, I mean like damn this sounds off the chain, like fuck food, give me head lmao!!
Yea, thats how this week is gonna start, next:
My sophmore year of college I went to this local club with some of my friends and saw this guy and told my friend I was going to get his number by the end of the night, which i did. We talked for a few weeks and he was really cool and fine as hell at the time. He played football for the school so he definitely had a nice body. So one day we are texting and he starts talking about how sexy I am, so I told him that he wasnt ready for all that. He started talking about how he was going to blow my back out and how I couldnt handle what he had, blah, blah, blah. Then he had the nerve to start singing the whisper song (ying yang twins). So i told him to come to my room so I could judge for myself. He must have ran to my dorm because he got my room quick! He knocked on the door and I answered in a black lace bra and black lace thong. BAD! First, he ask me to help him take his jacket off because his arm got stuck, then he needed help with his shirt, went all the way over to the other end of the bed to put the condom on, and was like " I cant". I went off. I told him he talked all that noise about what he was gone do and didnt do anything. I called him every name in the book and told him he had one job and couldnt even do that. I told him to get his stuff and get out of my room and he responded, "cant we just lay here naked and hold each other?" My response, "HELL NAW!"
See I told you guys out there don't be out there bragging on your dick let it speak for itself cause when you don't, this is what happens you get a chance to hit a home run and you end up getting 3stirkes and thrown the fuck out!! lol
Next we got a sex blooper coming from one of my niggas(He didnt mind me saying his name but I would rather not lmao):
See that fellas, this is what happens when you start going nuts and not payi ng attention instead of tearing her ass up you end up getting your balls slapped and not in a good way! But hey now you get a chance to see just how hard you be smacking her ass!! lmao
I LOVE VETS
The title explains it all, I love vets! I had my first vet ,older women, cougar, sugar mama, whatever you call it, experience at the age of 22. This woman was drop dead gorgeous! Big phat ass, big country titties, (shout out to Monster from Boyz N the Hood, lol) flat stomach, nice calves, and hella swag, you know everything a man looks for in a woman. When we met, I was working at a school and she was one of the parents. I use to tell her son everyday to tell his mother that I thought she was beautiful just to see if he would really deliver the message, which he did. A few days later his moms saw me studying for my college exam while at work and asked what I was studying for and the conversation just started flowing from their. It was during that conversation she threw it out there that she was 39 years of age. Hell she looked like she was all of 29 so we kept the conversation moving. Toward the end of the convo she gave me her work number and told me to call her if I needed help studying. In my head I was going nuts just thinking about studying the geometrics of her body while trying to figure out a hypothesis on how many licks it would take before she gripped and tried to rip my ears off. Three days later the answer to my curiosity was answered.
I called her while she was at work, she was happy as hell to hear from me which surprised me a little bit. She told me that she thought I wasn’t going to call since three days had passed. I hit her with a little line letting her know that I was busy with school and didn’t have the chance to call at a decent hour but the truth was I didn’t want to look to anxious or desperate even though I really wanted to call her a hour later she gave me the number, ya dig!! Since she knew, I was a stressed with my class load she asked if I wanted to go to the movies with her. I accepted and she told me to be at her place to pick her up around 8 p.m. I was happier than R. Kelly at a high school! On my way to pick her up she called and asked if I wanted to make it a Blockbuster night instead and to pick up a few brews on the way. Ain’t no question bout the answer she got soooo……….When I rang the doorbell with the movie, Mascoto and a 6 pack of beer we went upstairs to her living room and chilled for all of 10 minutes.
Next thing I know she opened a brew and handed it to me while I was sitting on the couch. She told me to relax and have a drink. While I’m drinking she reaches down and unzips my pants. She started stroking my shit with her hand, then decides to continuewith her mouth. The head was insane! I had my own version of Superhead going crazy in my lap. She was getting busy with the head. She gave me that sloppy shit with the flute action. She got her hands nice and wet and went hard no breaks for about a good 20 minutes.
After the head game I picked her up CTC (chest-to-chest) while cuffing her ass, walked her to the bedroom, laid her down on the bed and kissed all over her body till my lips kissed her love below (shout out to Andre 3000). Just like I envisioned she gripped and tried to rip my ears off. We changed positions from 69 to CTC to my favorite position the leg on shoulders, to the right leg on left shoulder, to doggystyle , to the asian cowgirl, to the reverse ride, to side fucking her. After all that, we both came and after some good sex, what’s next? Of course, Round Two!!! She sucked me back on full tilt only for me to get my strength back. I picked that fine motherfucka up and pinned her against the wall and went to work on that ass while standing. She had multiples (she came a lot) which made me happy knowing I was doing my job without having to ask cause if you got to ask chances are you were mediocre.
We had sex from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m. without any wasted minutes. I laid there with her butt ass naked till it was time for us to wake only to notice she wasn’t in the bed. I smelled bacon so I went downstairs and she was cooking breakfast with a housecoat on and nothing else under She kissed me on the cheek and told me to hit the shower and she will have breakfast ready by the time I’m out the shower. We ate breakfast in bed I told her I had to get ready to leave. When I left and got in the car I damn near patted myself on the back and made sure we stayed in touch. Even though we stayed in touch, flirted and visited each other from time to time I never had sex with her again because she got engaged maybe 2 months later. It was all good though cause she made my first time with a vet THE BEST SEX I EVER HAD. (Shoutout to R. Kelly, lol) Now tell me can you young girls top that?
WHOOOOOAAAA baby, thats how the older womean get down huh cuz? Shit, this week I need a viewer to answer this question he proposed can any of you young girls top that? If so im sending you to the cousin!! lol naw fucking with you but really can u young ladies top that?
Ok, so next um lets get back to the ladies and after a story like that, I think its only fair to let one of the women show these niggas how they suppose to get it in so.....
I have always loved having sex, even when I didn’t know why. Hopeful for at least 14 times a week, but every week an excuse would arise. Although I “had an appetite for destruction” I could never savor the plate. A sex drive unmatched and unwavering loyalty to every boyfriend w
ithout ever the sensation of an orgasm. Clueless, until this fine brother with some resemblance to a slightly thinner Morris Chestnut caught my attention one day. I was fresh out of a relationship as a result of my man having sex with his ex. I was out for revenge, in this club with my girls slapped off Hennessey Black and Cali Kush.
We were acting a fool when this chocolate brother eased behind me asking to dance. After obliging his offer, he grabbed my waist grinding unto my jeans had faded on his pants from the moisture and sweat. With every move I could feel the thickness of his shaft. Before we knew it we had danced all night. He leaned over my shoulder with the tip of his nose slightly touching
my ear. I could feel light breathes across my neck as he whispered, “Baby come home with me.” With little to no hesitation, I said, “Yes.”
When we got to his house, I began to wonder as he led me to his room. “I never had a one night stand. Two wrongs don’t make a right. So what payback is a bitch! Try some n
ew shit! I don’t wanna be a hoe. Damn I need some dick tho! Fuck it! He just betta be worth it, not no little dick muthafucka or one of dem supa emotional types. Damn this is a nice crib & it smell good.”
He slowly closed the door. I flopped across the bed that felt like it was spinning. He then stood me up and asked, “You ever did this before?” Giggly I said, “No, why?” He then smiled and said, “Just curious…. Do me a favor and trust me like yo man tonight.” I became tense although I said ok.
He then went to get a red tie out his closet. He used it to cover my eyes and began to take my clothes off piece by piece. When I was completely naked, I felt nothing, so I reached for him. Vigorously he said, “Don’t worry baby I’m still here, just be still while I look at how sexy you are.”
I smiled although I couldn’t help feel uncomfortable. Then I felt something shockingly cold. He used it to trace my lips down my chin to my neck, and around my nipples. He began to
lick and suck the trails of water that he left behind arousing me, but continuously stopping in t
he same force. He outlined every crevasse with the ice cube; around my navel down to my thighs and opened my pussy lips with the ice. He inserted the cube up in and out of pussy while he ate me out.
I remember thinking, “Damn this nigga is da shit!” My legs started to shake. I wanted to control them and stand my ground “literally,” but with him squeezing/smacking my ass and sucking my clit I knew they was becoming linguini (LOL). He noticed my lack of strength. Thus
he lifted me wrapping my legs around his neck, placing my back against a wall. At that moment, I had never felt this before. I felt like I had to pee, so I screamed let me down in fear that I was gonna piss all in his face. So he let me down and said, “What’s wrong?” Hastil
y I said, “I have to pee.” He laughed and said, “No you don’t. Tell me the n
ext time you feel that urge.”
Rapidly he grabbed me bending me over his bed. When he put it in me I had never felt so full. I put my hand on his shaft not only in disbelief, but to make sure this nigga had a rubber on. He stroked that shit and he caressed my nipples with one hand and bounced my
pussy back and forth on his dick harder, harder with the other. I started to get so slippery that it kept slipping out. Then I felt this peeing sensation again. I moaned, “I feel again!” Lightly he inserting his pinky finger in my ass, it wiggled. He took the other hand off my breast and began to pull my hair. In bafflement of what this new sensation was, I snatched the tie offmy face to look back but couldn’t. I got this sudden rush and then a tingling all over my body. He moaned and pulled out. As soon as he did that, I began to squirt backwards out my pussy. My entire my body shook for 2 minutes, and then I collapsed on the floor. He pickedme up and put me on top of his bed. I started to drift off to sleep when I said, “So that’s cumming?” Tenderly he said, “Yea. That’s what’s you compare it to every time.”
See fellas, you peeped my mans hit her with the ice trick, I could have sworn I told nigs to
do that shit weeks ago but whatever. Take notes fellas he even decided to go with a little surprise anal action! Freaky Freaky, but I'm still fucking with his tactics it was all for the sake of her pleasure!!
Alright Alright, now anyone who knows me or even have read Freaky Friday more than three times knows that I am a huge advocate of oral sex, especially with women I feel it
is a lost art that men have either gotten away from or been taught notto do leaving women fully unsatisfied. Its being used more than the past but still a lost art so im gonna let this reader show you guys, how a pro uses his tongue:
Damn, damn, Damn!! Standing Ovation to this guy. It was prolly smart not to post this nigs info, sweetheart, cause im sure its a few ladies who reading this like "Damn, where they do that at and can they bring it my way". The Bionic Pussy Eater, crazy!!!!
Now hold on its only one way to end this and that is to show you damn females out here how to suck the dick! This is from another one of my lady readers(where were all my niggas at smh) but she goes on, peep her technique and learn a vaulable lesson if you want to drop him a couple notches:
All my ladies out there to get a man to scream or run like a little bitch here you go(by the way this how I find out I like it too) …. Imma let yall in on something...to ladies that does this already go head keep doing what you doing ….but it started off I was giving my ex some head you know working the head, deep throat, one head motion, two head motion sucking the balls all that good shit…me I like to suck dick n especially when a guy is standing over me it drive me crazy but moving on so I’m into it he into of course he bust everywhere bottom of the face breast too he was finish but (smh)I wasn’t so after I help him nut by jagging him I began to suck on that dick again I look at his legs they started to shake he started grabbing on shit like a women do when giving her the good good … I swear I wasn’t even two min in and this nigga push me and takes of running like a little girl (BITCH) yelling” I can’t take it I just can’t take it “ (laughing ) I only met one guy who took it like a man but everyone else I did this to ran .. see I get a thrill outta doing that cause nigga be actin like they some g’s in the bedroom but keep sucking on that dick the bitch will come out (just not that one guy).
Yo after all of that I dont have a damn thing to say, not speechless at all but I feel like the readers already proved what Freaky Friday is about so shit:
"When seeking pleasure follow YourAddiction"
Hit me on twitter with how you liked this @SnewtyAddiction